walking on eggshells


Try walking.

Walking on eggshells

In high heels

Heel toe, heel toe.

Tread softly

To avoid injury

To that ego,

Ego so big there’s not enough room

in the office

Even in the basement,

A reminder

Of the pecking order.

A prized parking spot

for his wheels

Bavarian Motor Works’ finest

Luxury SUV

While you squeeze

Your plebian set of wheels,

A Volkswagen between

The pillar and the dusty pipes.

Yes all animals are equal*,

Only some are more equal

Than others.

You would do well

To remember that little fact.

Smiling through gritted teeth

At the backhanded compliments

On your efforts

to hold onto

That bottom rung

Of the corporate ladder.

*From George Orwell, Animal Farm

*Picture courtesy of Pinterest

©️ Nomathemba Pearl Dzinotyiwei 2018


Mother’s Day

This is who I do this for

The unborn generations

And the children I bore.

Let me remind you who I do this for

My matrilineal line

Those who’ve gone before.

This is who I do this for

The women that never made it to school

Or to the factory floor.

Let me remind you who I do this for

Those that died in childbirth

Too far from the hospital door.

This is who I do this for

The women in domestic service

Still getting up to scrub the floor.

This is for the hustler,

The worker,

The housewife,

Bespectacled academic

High-flying executive

The married one

The single one

The one grieving

Longing to hold

Her departed child

one more time.

You deserve more than a day

Of celebrations

You are worthy of celebration

For all time.

©️ Nomathemba Pearl Dzinotyiwei

Traditional South African Music

This song from the Hugh Masekela Tribute Concert keeps ringing in my head.

It’s called Koboyi, a song sung to a child in Siswati. There are two versions on Apple Music. The lyrics are not so sweet though.

Koboyi Koboyi (Koboyi is the name of the child)

Ye Koboyi

Koboyi Koboyi

Ye Koboyi

Unyok’ uyephi (where is your mother?)

Ye Koboyi

Uyokujuma (she’s taking the young men by surprise)

Ye Koboyi


Ye Koboyi

Uta buya nesisu (she’ll come back pregnant)

Ye Koboyi

Atal’umntwana (she’ll give birth to a child)

Ye Koboyi

Ambek’etsheni (and put him on a rock)

Ye Koboyi

Atyiwe timpetfu (and he’ll be eaten by maggots)

Ye Koboyi

Koboyi Koboyi

Ye Koboyi

Koboyi Koboyi

Ye Koboyi

Ngalala Phansi

Ngalala Phansi was originally sung by Miriam Makeba who learnt it from her mother Nomkomandelo Christina Jele, a traditional healer known as isangoma. It tells of a person who is ill but laments that people are rejoicing at her illness. The song is on Miriam Makeba’s album Sangoma.

Hhayi bajabula bonk’uma ngilele phansi Bawo!

Iya ho ho mmm

Hhayi bajabula bonk’uma ngilele phansi Bawo!

Iya ho ho mmm

Ngagula ho ngalala phansi

Ngagula babo ngalala phansi

Ngagula mme ngalala phansi

Ngagula ho ngalala phansi babo

Do Not Weep (Tribute to Winifred Nomzamo Zanyiwe Mandela)

Do not weep for me.

I did not just die.

Like a grain of wheat

I fell to the ground and multiplied,

Bringing forth a generation

Of black women,

Conscious, militant and proud

Now awakened from the slumber

Induced by racism, patriarchy

Rank materialism and conspicuous consumption

Now dressed in black with doeks

A multitude of raised right fists

With a single cry


Do not weep my children

I am in a better and beautiful place.

Were it your time

I would gather all of you

Whom I love dearly

And bring you here to stay forever.

Zenani with her spirit in all its beauty

Was waiting to welcome me

Together with Tata

With that broad smile that reaches his eyes

‘Welcome home Zami!’ he said.

All of my family,

Kalushi, Chris and Helen are here too*

With the other comrades

Miriam and Hugh are jamming

Together with Bob Marley

In the name of the Lord.

Do not weep my people

Though you pierced my heart

with a thousand arrows

Careless words

Unleashed from a bow strung with the lies

Spun by the enemy.

Though you do not see me now

You will see me in a little while

When He returns

Then the liars too will mourn

Just as the Jews will mourn

For the one they pierced

Like one mourns a first-born son.

For what they did to me

They also did to my Lord.

Do not weep.

Do not mourn.

I’m the one who tries.

The road I chose

Was a hard one

Paved with sorrows

Birthing a nation is hard

If it takes a village to raise a child

Raising this nation will need all of you.

To feed the hungry

Clothe the naked

Visit the sick and those in prison

Do this for the least of your brothers and sisters

Do it for my Lord

Do it for me.

Do not weep all of you

Now the wagging tongues are stilled

The strivings have ceased

I fought for liberty on earth

But in this place,

I am truly free.

©️ Nomathemba Pearl Dzinotyiwei

*Solomon Mahlangu, Chris Hani and Helen Joseph

Copyright & Privacy Statement

Information on this website may be copied for  personal use only. No part of this website may be reproduced, stored, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, scanning, or otherwise, except as permitted under Section 107 or 108 of the 1976 United States Copyright Act, without the prior written permission of the author. Requests to the author and publisher for permission should be addressed to the following email: nomathembapearld@gmail.com.

This blog does not share personal information about blog visitors with any third parties. We do not collect information about your visit to this blog for any purposes other than analysis of content performance through the use of “cookies.” You can turn off the use of cookies any time in your browser’s setting. This policy is subject to change without notice.

No Fatigue

Sermon: 28 January 2018 at Northrand Methodist Church


Nehemiah 4:10

“Meanwhile, the people in Judah said, “The strength of the laborers is giving out, and there is so much rubble that we cannot rebuild the wall.””

Nehemiah‬ ‭4:10‬ ‭NIV‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬


Nehemiah was a Jew, living in exile. He was the cup-bearer to the King Ataxerxes of Persia. When Nehemiah heard reports of how the Jews were suffering and defenseless in Jerusalem, He requested a leave of absence from his master to go and rebuild the wall in Jerusalem. The Lord allowed the king to show him favour and give permission and provide resources for the wall of Jerusalem to be rebuilt.

What is the background to this story? The people of the kingdom of Judah, those who remained in The kingdom after the people were taken into exile to Babylon by King Nebuchadnezzar. They included the descendants of Judah and Benjamin, plus a remnant of the Israelites who had fled after the fall of the Israelite Kingdom In Samaria. The kingdoms of Israel and Judah were destroyed after the people turned away from God’s command to worship him and him alone and began to worship idols. God allowed the armies of Assyria to first destroy Israel and then for the Babylonians to destroy Jerusalem. The people were taken into exile. After Babylonians laid siege to Jerusalem, the walls were destroyed meaning that the inhabitants of the city were not safe.The Babylonians used the siege method, to prevent anyone coming in or out of a city and cut off the supply lines of food and other provisions. Eventually the people starved, the city was too weak to defend itself and it was invaded by the Babylonians who destroyed it, looted the temple of its treasures, destroyed it and destroyed the city walls. Most of the people were then taken into exile and only a remnant was left. This was prophesied in the book of Ezekiel. The empire of Babylon was eventually divided among the Medes and the Persians after the deaths of Nebuchadnezzar and his son Belshazzar who succeeded him.

Admiring The Problem

On his return to Jerusalem, Nehemiah recruited men to rebuild the wall, organized them into teams and they began to work. When they heard that someone had come back to rebuild the walls of Jerusalem, the enemies of Israel, Sanballat, Tobiah, the Ammonnites, the people of Ashdod (Anakites) and the Arabs did not want the wall to be rebuilt and plotted and schemed to keep it from happening. They had rejoiced over the destruction of Judah and did not want to see the kingdom rise again or the people to possess the land. The Jews rebuilding the wall were under constant threat of being attacked. So, the men who built the wall worked with their weapons at their side while the others kept watch and were ready to fight in the case of an attack. After some time, the men were exhausted and those watching could see it. There were two problems. The men experienced physical, mental and emotional fatigue because they were working and watching and had to be ready to fight. They also experienced discouragement because they saw that there was a lot of rubble that needed to be cleared and they felt overwhelmed by the task of rebuilding the wall. They felt defeated by the task.

The Significance of the Wall

What was the significance of the wall? Walls restrict entry to the city, the only way to enter an ancient city was through the gates. The watchmen at the gates were stationed there to prevent people entering the city that should not be there. Walls provide protection. Before the advent of modern aerial warfare with explosives, no one dared attack a city with walls because the army only has to defend the Gates. The walls remained in some parts from the original city of the Jebusites after they had been defeated by King David. The significance of the wall was to keep the city safe from invasion. The destruction of the walls of Jerusalem was symbolic of the Lord removing his spiritual barrier of protection from the Jews because of their idolatry and sin. However, the Lord promised to return a remnant of the Jews to Jerusalem and to protect them. This is why Nehemiah was inspired to return to rebuild the wall to fulfill the promise made by the Lord through the prophet Ezekiel. Building the wall was the beginning. This was to be followed by the rebuilding of the Temple as described in the book of Zechariah as well as in Ezekiel. The earthly Jerusalem is a shadow of the heavenly Jerusalem described in the book of Revelation.

So the Jews felt defeated by the task at hand. They could not see how they would clear the rubble and finish building the wall. Some of those walls were built before The Israelites possessed the land. So these were mighty solid structures and they needed to clear the rubble. They were focusing on the problem and not the vision as foretold by the prophets or the possibility of accomplishing the task, which was finishing the wall and creating the feeling of safety, that the people craved. We call it admiring the problem. How many times do we feel defeated by the rubble when we need to rebuild something in our lives?

Mind, Body and Spirit

What is it about human beings that makes us susceptible to fatigue and discouragement? Human beings have a mind, body and a spirit. The spirit is the divine essence, the eternal part of us that is created in the image of God. There is a Mind-Body Connection which means what happens in the mind, affects the body, and what affects the body affects the mind. The spiritual connection is one that people rarely talk about. The Spirit man is eternal while the body and the mind are destroyed by death. The three elements of our nature are constantly interacting and affecting each other. Sexual immorality not only brings diseases to your body and affects your mind, but it also affects your spirit. This understanding is important for our total wellbeing.

So how do we prevent fatigue?

1. Look after the body. The body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. Ant temple must be kept clean, repaired and adorned. So we must rest, sleep, groom ourselves and exercise. Jesus took time to rest. That was the purpose of the Sabbath. 1 Corinthians 6:19

2. Care for the mind, relax, do something fun, Jesus and the disciples didn’t work all the time. They relaxed, ate together and conversed. In Exodus, there are occasions for celebration such as the Passover and different festivals for people to enjoy.

3. Nurture the spirit. How do we nurture the spirit?

1. Personal Devotions – read the word, praise, worship & pray. Studies have shown that this relieves stress. Worship with others, stay in community. Pray with your family.

2. Maintain good relationships, the Bible talks about a friend who is closer than a brother in Proverbs 18:24. Our relationships help to keep us in good spirits.

3. Read literature and listen to music that is uplifting, too much negativity in the world and it affects your spirit.

4. Maintain personal boundaries. The Bible says guard your heart in Proverbs 4:23, for from it arises the issues of life. A famous poem, the Desiderata by Max Ehrmann says ‘Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexatious to the spirit. You also need to avoid needy people who drain your physical and emotional energy

5. Avoid negative thinkers – those who remind you of how bad things are, how much better things were or how there is no hope for the future. They are also known as Roadblock prophets. The Jews around Jerusalem also reinforced the negativity which served to discourage the buildersRemind yourself that of Jeremiah 29:11, the plans of God to prosper and not to harm you.


What are you building in your life? Is it your career? A family ? a business? Is what you are building based on a vision from the Lord? The Bible says in Psalm 127:1 Unless the Lord Builds the house, the builders labor in vain. So when your vision is supported by God’s desire for your life, you have every reason to succeed. When you are tired look to the Lord for strength. In the book of Isaiah 40:31, the word says ,Those who hope in the lord will renew their strength. They will rise up on wings like eagles, they will walk and not grow faint.’ I would like to encourage you to get your vision from the Lord, because that vision will not fail. Do the work and when you feel discouraged, put your hope in the Lord.

Dark Chocolate

Dark Chocolate

From the equatorial forest.

In my imagination,

We make a beautiful duet.

His dark chocolate

with my caramel entwined.

Heady and sensual,

Utterly irresistible.


Like shot of espresso

The colour of his eyes.

One look, is all it took.

The cup of my heart is brimming.

My head is swimming,

Like after an Irish coffee.

A shot of whiskey,

A dash of cream,

Stirred with a chocolate spoon.

The worst addiction

Demands gratification.

The food of the gods and

The Devil’s own elixir.

Secretly brewed in the dead of night

Now incarnate.

The ultimate black magic,

No cure from a medic.

Desperately sinking,

A maelstrom of emotions.

The worst part of it,

We’ve never even spoken.

Perfect Match

Smart girls make dumb choices. I’ve made a few of my own. Ladies hear this:

Your perfect match does not:

1. Shine on your shine. We know what that’s about. He has to have the spotlight ALL THE TIME. *eyes rolling*

2. Disrespect his mother, his sister or any female member of his family. He is courteous, even under provocation. He walks away rather than escalate a fight.

3. Talk badly about you behind your back, to ANYONE, especially the OTHER WOMAN. And if you are the other woman, he is not your perfect match either.

4. Disrespect you in front of the family. Especially HIS family. Nor does he embarrass you in front of other people, random strangers in particular.

5. Keep you waiting. You’re dressed up, dolled up, it’s 8pm, he’s a no show and he hasn’t called. NO, that is not the time to cry, change, then lie on the couch with a tub of ice-cream. You grab your purse, take an UBER ride and you hit the club, with or without him. Take a girlfriend if you can’t do it alone. If you meet him there, act like you don’t know him. He has already proven that he is not worthy of you. Keep it moving.

6. Ditch you for his friends, see point 5 above.

7. Push, shove, slap or kick you. In fact that should be point no. 1.

8. Start drooling over other women in your presence. However hot, he’s feeling about that girl in the hotpants, low cut blouse, whatever, he keeps it to himself ALWAYS. In fact if he’s the one, she could be stark naked and he won’t even see it.

9. He’s generous and responsible with his money. He doesn’t “forget” his wallet. He pays his bills on time and doesn’t spend every cent of his money, or yours for that matter.

10. He keeps his word. See point 5 above. Life happens, but he is civil, maintains healthy boundaries with his ex- girlfriend, ex-wife and he takes care of his children. And if he can’t make it, he calls.

Ladies, I pray you attract The One. That you will know that he’s the one and there is no doubt in his mind either, that you’re the one for him.

And gentlemen, if you do not do any of these things, then You’re the Man! I know your soul mate, your perfect match is out there. I pray that she recognises the good man that you are,  when you meet.

No Rules Digital Edition Available on Amazon

It’s Official! No Rules: An African Love Story is now available on the Amazon Kindle Store. To go to the store, copy the link below into your internet browser.

If you want to purchase the book and you don’t have a credit card you can send me your details via the contact form on the blog and I will assist you.

A Working Girl’s Dream

Picture Courtesy of Pinterest

Dr. King had a dream.

One deeply rooted in the American dream

That one day his nation would rise up

Would live up to its creed,

“We hold these truths to be self evident: that all men are created equal.”

Dr King had a dream too,

That his four little children would one day live in a nation,

Where they would be judged

Not by the color of their skin,

But by the content of their character.

I too, an ordinary working woman

Have a dream.

Of the day,

When my dark skin, thick lips and nappy hair will not be held against me.

When I will be judged by the stellar results of

My hard work

Leadership qualities and

The brilliant disruptive game-changing genius of my creative mind.

Not by
My expensively made up face, (I only wear Mac darling) or;

The red soles on my stilettos (Genuine Louboutins dear, I don’t wear knock -offs);

Not by

The hideously expensive boutique original outfit (You know from his Ready to Wear Autumn Winter Collection, darling)

Nor by

The price of my handbag, ( Check the label and the stitching please)

the car I drive; or

The address of the secure complex where I lay my head.

Judge me,

Not by

My ability to flatter, woo and schmooze; or

The impeccably impregnable facade of my perfectly managed perceptions,

All designed to flatter and placate superiors

To prove that I’m worthy of my place.

On that day my spirit will dance and my soul will sing.

Free At Last! Free At Last! Thank God Almighty! We’re Free At Last!

Yes! A working girl can dream too!

In living colour!